Tuesday, April 15, 2014

day 185 : quitting things that suck {and why its okay}

lets talk about it! 

a couple weeks ago, carla wrote this post about how its totally okay to be a quitter.

i am not a quitter.
as a kid, i played certain sports, even when i wasn't very good. 
in band, i kept playing, even though i didn't always love it.

as an adult, i have never quit a job.
i have left jobs because i moved, or nanny jobs that ended because the kids went to school ; stuff like that. but, i have never gotten up and walked out.
until last week.

this post isn't entirely about that, though...

not too long ago, i took a job that *sounded* perfect. it was a position that would be awesome for me. a location that was easy to bike and bus to. it was 20 hours a week, which meant i would still be able to work on the Be Nice Box, while also making a decent amount of supplemental income.
sounded great.

you guys, NOT GREAT!
i won't be the guy that blasts an employer on the internet {hello, this is a kindness blog!} BUT, i will say this ; that environment was toxic.
the space, the leadership, the energy ; all of it.
it only took me a few weeks to realize how NOT ME this position was.

the day i quit shouldn't have come as a surprise to the owner. she totally steamrolled me and bullied me in front of the entire staff.
after i finished seething and calmed down ; i composed a professional email and quit.

so, how is this a good deed?
its a lesson in staying true to YOU.
i have a lot of really amazing people in my life. people who are doing unconventional things. people who are leaving lucrative {but awful} jobs to try to follow their own dreams. people who are selling things {homes, cars} so they can fund businesses they dream about every minute of the day.

this life is way too short to be doing things that you hate. things that make you feel sick. things that honestly make you feel like you are having a heart attack.

i know that some people disagree with me {even if you hate something, you should suck it up and do it, anyways...} ; but right now, where i stand and what i stand for ; its so important to do things that have value, meaning and make me feel like i am doing the right thing in the world!

tell us : have you ever quit a job? 


  1. This is a beautiful post Diana! I've quit a few jobs, for feeling like I hadn't found my right type of work, but in the end, I think the reason why I could never find a day job that I loved, was because it wasn't a good fit for me. Now, I make less money, and work harder than I would if I had a regular job, but I love what I do and have adapted a less is more lifestyle. My husband and I live in a small home, and live a simple lifestyle, but we have more freedom and flexibility than those on the daily grind schedule. It's a tough go, but it's absolutely worth the try if you believe in yourself! Good for you for saying it's OKAY to be a quitter. ♥ Xoxo

    1. thanks Janell! i totally agree with you. B & I definitely live in a 'less is more' mindset. we dont have tv, or gym memberships and we are actually selling our only car tomorrow! i think the 'american dream' that so many people work for in the business world almost always yields stressful and toxic environments!

  2. I quit a nannying job once because the mother was completely unrealistic in her expectations for what she was paying me (less than minimum wage). But, other than that, no. It's weird because I will eventually have to quit my current job when I decide to move home, and that will be weird. I will say, though, if I wouldn't have been in another country, I would have quit this job when I first got here because the boss WAS a bully. He screamed at me in front of the entire staff once and I was so angry I would have walked out. It is definitely OK to be a quitter in this instance!

    1. bully bosses really are the worst!
      and i had a woman contact me once about nannying for her 4 kids and she offered to pay $6 an hour...
      walking a dog around here nets $18/hr ; that woman was bonkers!

  3. Hey there - I am so sorry to hear that your job did not work out! It really sounded PERFECT, writing and aligning with your personal interests - but GOOD FOR YOU for listening to your heart and not staying for the paycheck! I am in the process of preparing to leave my full-time gig and the fear can be OVERWHELMING at times. But I have to trust that there will always be enough and that our hearts will NOT lead us astray! =) The right door will open up - maybe your time/energy is needed elsewhere right now! Good luck on your journey...Hugs and love.

    1. amanda, you are AWESOME! i think, a lot of times, people are in crappy situations {your pants are too tight, your girlfriend is kind of a jerk, your boss is mean} and we think that its totally fine and 'life is just like that.' setting super high standards can be super scary and overwhelming, but we all deserve to be in life-places where we feel good, safe & healthy!

  4. I just quit what I thought would be my "dream job". It quickly became incredibly toxic, stressful, and took a negative effect on all aspects of my life. While making this decision has made me so much happier, I still catch myself making judgments on myself for being too weak, or not sticking it out long enough. Your post, and sharing Carla's post is perfect timing for me. I so appreciate it, and am sure you will find happiness in another, better work environment!

    1. high-five for making that choice, kiri! i went through that, too! 'maybe i didnt like this job cuz *i* wasnt good enough' 'maybe it was *ME* that was making my boss // the environment so lame.' but, we all know who we are and what we stand for! it takes a lot of risk and strength to leave something you know is awful for you!